Do you all know I write a blog?
I guess if you are reading it here, you might have been here
before. I write about my life, as I see
it (my blog, duh) and I don’t make any apologies for it. Okay, to be fair, I apologized once for
calling this one guy a pussy whipped pathetic loser. I didn’t actually apologize for what I said
about him, but for not having warned him that I was calling him a said pussy
whipped pathetic loser in a public blog that as high as a dozen people (not any
of his friends) might read. That, and
that although I did not actually use his name, I would not feel bad in
divulging his name if someone asked (mostly so they could avoid him, I am
sure). He called me a whore right after
that (awesome!) when he read a few of my other uncensored blog posts and
thought we couldn’t be friends then because of the sexual nature of them
(again, awesome!). My regret was that I
hadn’t come up with anything more colorful to call him than a pussy whipped
pathetic loser, but I can learn from my mistakes.
So back to writing this blog. You still reading? Good, because I need readership. Yes, perfectly self serving and possibly a
little desperate, but today I would really like people to read this stuff. And
what does that have to do with you, you ask?
Here goes:
1) Read this blog.
You are already here, so thank you!
I get a little obsessed about my numbers sometimes. Yes, there is a way
to track this, and every blogger (okay, most bloggers) out there knows how many
hits they got on a particular post at any given time. I want this number to be higher. So while you are reading it right now, I want
you to also log on and read it from your hand-held device, your smart phone, your
work computer, your boyfriend’s computer, your second cousin’s pet tarantula’s
computer, and anywhere else you so desire.
See, each time you read it from a different device, I get a hit. Hits are good in this case, and more (in this
case) is what I am shooting for.
2) Follow this blog.
You already read it, so now click the little button in the right hand
side that says “JOIN THIS SITE” and you get to be one of my fans. I don’t know what actually happens after
that, like if there is some “Follower Genie” that will send you emails telling
you when I have once again posted something amazing for you to read, but you
might as well have your little icon picture right there on my page. Oh, and let me know if you have a blog. I like to follow blogs.
3) Tell your friends.
You are enjoying reading and following the blog, so share the
wealth. You can have book club meetings
about it even, all of you reading the blog, sharing with people what you gleaned
from the amazing value it brought into you life, and how inspired you are to
continue to read and grow. I suggest you
do this over a few (I suggest a half dozen) glasses of wine or pints of beers, in a smoky dive bar, in a part of town you
are not likely to be seen. It is more
fun that way.
4) Give me feedback.
No, I don’t really want you to point out spelling errors. Or grammar errors. Or suggest that I use too many
non-sentences. I know all that. It is a style thing. I am good with that part. But, what do you want to read? I have a gazillion stories about the woes of
being a single mom with amazing kids and an idiot for an ex. I could talk endlessly about surviving my
mother. I could brag on my kids forever.
I can save you a little trouble here and say that I don’t post pictures because:
a) selfies as a fad needs to go away, b) I want my kids to have a little tiny
bit of privacy (I will use the pictures against them later at my discretion),
c) If there are no pictures of me I have deniability in court, and d) you do
not really need me up in your face with scary pics of myself in a too tight
tank top, or some silly graphic that I pulled off bing. But other than that, tell me what you DO
want, and I will listen (as much as my creativity will allow). And since you are now a fan (remember you are
now FOLLOWING my blog, right?), you might as well have some semblance of
ownership, no matter how false it actually is, and read what you like.
Feel free to go back and read older blogs. I never actually read them myself, because
honestly I was a huge mess back then. If
you do like to read expose-type blogs, reading from the first blog forward in
time will give you the best picture of who I was, who I am, and where I am
going. It will also give me tons of
hit-counts to my page views. Win Win.
Are you still reading here?
Awesome, Thanks! Now go tell
someone else, and feel free to share the link anywhere you want. I won’t mind.
